[Parenn911]

ROFL
1. Speed limits are just suggestions
2. You take a major highway to school (95, 495,28, etc)
3. You constantly complain about there being nothing to do, even though you are right next to DC
4. You have at least 2 friends who have no idea what their parents do because its "top secret" government work
5. 50% of your senior class plans on going either to UM, Towson, or UMBC
6. When people ask where you're from, you tell them DC because it's easier to explain
7. You have more than 3 recipes for Crab Cakes
8. You refer to your state as "Merlind"
9. It's not actually tailgating unless your bumper is touching the car
in front of you.
10. A yellow light means at least 5 more cars can get through.
11. A red light means 2 more can.
12. It takes you 30 minutes to drive 10 miles
13. Your local news is national news
14. If you hear the word "sniper" one more time you're going to slap someone
15. You actually know what the black boxes at stoplights are for
16. Even if your high school is only a year old, its already overcrowded
17. You have over 500 students in your graduating class
18. Despite the fact that Maryland fought for the south in the Civil War, you are NOT, under ANY circumstances, a "southerner"
19. You are friends with people from at least 2 other high schools
20. You know at least 2 people who drive a Mercedes, BMW, Lexus, etc.
21. The cars in the student parking lot are worth 3x those in the teacher parking lot.
22. You are amused by visiting relatives who are actually excited to see Washington DC
23. You are amazed when you go out of town and the people at McDonalds speak English
24. You can cross 4 lanes of traffic in under 30 seconds
25. There are at least 3 malls within 20 minutes of your house
26. There are at least 6 Starbucks within 20 minutes of your house
27. You or someone in your family has a Smart Tag
28. Homework/Extra credit for a class has been to visit a museum in DC
29. When traveling, you have your choice of 3 airports
30. You pronounce "Bowie" BOO-ie not BOW-ie or BAUW-ie
31. An inch of snow and you miss 3 days of school
32. All the potholes just add a little excitement to your driving
experience
33. Stop signs mean slow down a little, but only if you feel like it
34. A rich white kid driving a BMW while blasting rap music is a common occurrence
35. You call things "ghetto" even though in most of the rest of the country it'd be high class
36. You or most of your friends have a 3-car garage
37. You don't actually keep your cars in it.
38. When you were driving on the beltway at 2:13am on a Tuesday there was still traffic

39. Crown Victoria = undercover cop

40. A slow driver is someone who isn't going at least 10mph over the speed limit

41. You understand the meaning of "If you don't get it, you don't get it"
42. Subway is a fast food place. The transportation system is known as Metro, and only Metro
43. You've taken a wrong turn somewhere late at night and ended up in a bad part of DC (ex. anacostia)
44. French fries just don't taste right without Old Bay
45. They just tore down the old farm house across the street and put 12 new houses in its place
46. The word Hfstival actually means something to you
47. Someone has honked at you because you didn't peal out the second the light turned green.
48. You've honked at someone because they didn't peal out the second the light turned green.
49. Rush hour lasts all day
50. For the cost of your house, you could own a small town in Iowa
51. Helicopters and airplanes flying above your neighborhood is a normal occurrence.
52. You know more than 10 people who own boats and they all park them at the same marina in Annapolis
53. If you stay on the same road long enough, it will eventually have 3 new names.
54. You have to dial the area code to call your neighbor
55. You live 5 minutes from at least 2 high schools, but you go to one that's 30 minutes away.
56. You know at least 3 alternate routes to avoid sitting at a stoplight.
57. You can't pull up to a 7-11 without seeing at least one cop, and usually there's another cop sitting not too far away.
58. You refer to distances in minutes, not miles.
59. When in Florida, you can only laugh when you see signs saying "Real Maryland Blue Crab Cakes!"
60. Talking on metro in the morning is prohibited

[markwemple]

When you ordered your new car you found out that turn signals are an option (one that no one gets!)
An older home, means that it has been up atleast a year.
Mature landscaping means it HAS trees.
The "Eastern Shore" has a beach on it's west side.
There is only one "bridge."
There is no indigenous accent.
That a California "Native" comes after 5 years, in Maryland its 2!
You're poor unless you make $100,000+ (and that is if you are still living with mom and dad).
You drive faster in the rain to avoid getting wet.
Siding salesmen make more than Lawyers and McDonalds employees make more than Teachers.
You thought that fraud was a part of every election. (OK so that's for the younger crowd).
You have never driven more than a mile off a highway without running into a stoplight or stop sign.
You can end up in federal court for a local matter and local court for a federal matter.
You ask a cop to read you your Miranda rights and he says "what?"
Seafood and Chicken are considered "vegetarian."
Your neighbor's front door cost more than his car.
Getting your car inspected, and it passed, just doubled its value.
It cost more to get your car to pass inspection than you paid for it in the first place.
Your insurance payment is more than your car payment.
(still working on it)

[Parenn911]

Great stuff Mark!

[Verruckt]

You guys are scaring me. I am moving to NOVA in a month. They don't have any of those kinds of problems here in Hawaii.

[Vicegrip]

Moving from the 50th state to NOVA? Bummer Dude!

Don't worry Maryland is not NOVA. In NOVA we have our own set of beefs.

Welcome to the Dorki board. What you driving?

[OldTee]

When every meeting, gathering or fun fest is held in rebel territory!

[Parenn911]

Welcome Verruckt. As Kurt said, NoVA has it's own list of problems . You are leaving paradise to come enjoy four seasons .

[Chronos]

Originally Posted by Verruckt

You guys are scaring me. I am moving to NOVA in a month. They don't have any of those kinds of problems here in Hawaii.

Eh, bra. You know da kine.

Grew up in Hawai'i and am now resigned to life on the East Coast. Isn't all bad, but it is a MAJOR cultural shift from the islands.

- One displaced hapa-haole